I am eternally grateful to the group of philosophers and philosophy students who have provided wonderful insights on my post.
As the title suggests, this post is not some decisive refutation of classical theism. Definitely not. Classical theism is a formidable, fruitful, and deeply intellectually respectable research program. Rather, it is a short post presenting a number of prima facie (i.e. at first glance; upon first inspection; seems or appears true on the face of it) problems for classical theism.
Suppose you work at a Play-Doh factory. Suppose further you work in the “red division”, the part of the factory dedicated to creating, forming, and packaging red Play-Doh. All you see every day is red Play-Doh coming out of the machines.